The 10 Commandments For Pedestrians

The first step towards making positive change in your life is to accept where you are right now. So here goes - I hate pedestrians. Can't stand 'em. They get on my nerves, they are totally infantile, and they are the most self-centered, egotistical group of people in the world (besides unions). WOW - this feels GREAT! But it's not just enough to level complaints against a group without offering a plan of action for change. So pedestrians of the world - read these 10 Commandments. Most importantly: follow them for God's sake!

1. Thou shalt remember that the road is made for cars, not thou. As car owners, we allow you to use our roadways, not the other way around.

2. Thou shalt be reminded that the cars have the right of way in practice. I know what the law says (many a pedestrian have quoted it to me verbatim). But will that law be much solace to you when you're hit by a car? Cars are bigger, stronger, faster. The roads were made for cars not people (read commandment 1 again). So to protect yourself, approach your pedestrian practice not with what a piece of paper says, but what the streets say - cars REALLY have the right of way. I know that this information is humbling - something very difficult for pedestrians to accept. But this newfound awareness will help protect you from accidents.

3. Thou shalt cross streets at designated crosswalks only. I am amazed at how many pedestrians just cross a street wherever the hell they feel like it. Doesn't matter where, they just start walking. We car owners have designated certain spots for you pedestrians to cross - please observe them.

4. Thou shalt cross at crosswalks only when the pedestrian crossing sign is on. Again - the arrogance of pedestrians astounds me. You don't cross the street whenever you feel like it - you wait till the ped xing sign tells you to cross. Just like for me, I don't drive my car across an intersection until the traffic light is green. Wake up people!!

5. Thou shalt look before crossing. Don't just start walking. It's called taking responsibility. When driving, I look both ways before turning onto a street. It's basic safety. So pedestrians: try thinking of someone else besides yourself and look both ways before crossing a street. This leads me to.....

6. Thou shalt not give me the look whilst crossing the street. This one (and # 7) hack me off the most. A pedestrian crosses a busy street right in the middle of that street but not on a crosswalk. I then have to slow down for their irresponsibility. They in turn give me the biggest scowl and look of "Hey! I'm crossing now. What are YOU doing driving? How dare you drive close to me as I'm crossing. I'm the pedestrian. I have the right of way." The same look applies when a pedestrian crosses on a red light and I (again) have to slow down for that same pedestrian. Drop the attitude.

7. Thou shalt haul thy ass when crossing. Please - when you are crossing the street, put a move on it! It once again boils down to thinking of others besides yourself. Pick up the pace. Others (many) are waiting on you (one).

8. Thou shalt not talk when approaching a crosswalk. Be aware. Pay attention. Stop talking on your phone or to your friends when you are about to cross so that you keep the pace moving along. Decide now to accept responsibility for your part in traffic back up and resolve today to be present, aware, and FAST when crossing the street.

9. Thou shalt not stop in the middle of the street when crossing. Does this really need any commentary?

10. Thou shalt love and accept car owners for who they are. Stop the discrimination. Show the love. Remember that car owners are people too. We are responsible, loving people. Pedestrians are not morally superior to car owners. Can't we all just get along?

So there you go. If the above 10 Commandments are followed, the world will be a more harmonious efficient hate-free place. So in the spirit of the holiday season, let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with those friggin' pedestrians.

A Fish Called Zenny

I think that I shall never get, why someone makes a fish a pet. I mean really. Fish? Pet? Now before you start hurling judgment darts my way, let me say that I fully support the rights of ANYONE to have a fish as a pet. I may not understand how a fish can be a pet, but I don't have to. I have a dog as a pet and I'm sure that there are many people out there who don't understand that either - we politely excuse their incredible ignorance and stupidity by labeling them as "not a dog person". But what I do understand is that when you are asked to take care of someone's pet, you take that responsibility seriously. Such was the case with our next door neighbour. He and his girlfriend were going out of town for some R&R and asked us to watch their beloved goldfish Zenny. 2 feedings a day, no need to clean the water, will return in 2 days. Simple. Clean. Easy. But we're staying overnight in Mission, BC to celebrate Christmas Day and Boxing Day with a group of friends. "No worries at all", our neighbour re-assured us. "He'll be fine if you're gone 24 hours - just feed him before you leave and as soon as you get back".

So off to Mission we go. Lots of Christmas turkey was eaten. LOTS of Christmas cheer was consumed. Many smiles, laughter, and connections with friends were had. New friends were found. But the next morning on Boxing Day (that's the day after Christmas for my American readers), the snow was EVERYWHERE! Another serious dump of snow was in the process. The roads were getting worse and worse. Our first thoughts of course went to our safety - should we go home right now? Maybe we should stay another night. Will our car make it OK? We probably just need to stay put another night and visit with our dear friends. But then we were reminded of.......Zenny. We did have a committment to take care of the bugger but my God it's just a fish. If Zenny croaks, our neighbour can get another one - right? How attached REALLY can you get to a fish? But being raised well by our fine Southern mothers who instilled in both David and me a fierce sense of responsibility, we decided that for the sake of Zenny, we better head home. So back to Vancouver we went. The roads were TERRIBLE!! We passed several accidents, several emergency vehicles winding through the maze of cars. We talked about turning back (but how can we make it back up the hills leading back to our friends?). We talked of staying in a hotel along the way (but do they take pets? [our dog - a real pet]). Then I saw.....Zenny. Swimming around happily in his tank oblivious to the amount of sacrifice and potential danger we were exposing ourself to to make sure he sees another day in this world. So we toiled on. Navigating hills and ice spots and slow cars. Finally we made it home, gave Zenny his food, and settled in a for a relaxing evening at home.

Really - if it had not been for Zenny, we would have stayed in Mission another night without even batting an eye. But as I reflected on our scary two and a half hour journey home, I was reminded of several powerful things. That you really can do whatever you set your heart to. That even though others around you are screwing up and causing accidents (literally in our case), you can emerge safely through by being attentive and responsible on your own journey. That fear of circumstances or listening to what others say you should or shouldn't do can hinder and destroy your own path and possibilities. And that caring for a fish in a scary snowstorm sometimes is the most enlightening thing to do.

A Snowy Christmas Eve In Vancouver

I am a West Coast flake. Let me be perfectly clear about that. I care about the environment. I love Al Gore. I commune with nature. I am open to and have experienced a variety of spiritual practices. I can eat sushi like it's candy. I practice yoga. I eat organic. I have a personal trainer. And I love the mild climate. Our summers are warm and sunny. Our winters are wet with mild temps. Winters are wonderfully green and moist. In fact, Vancouver's year-round "green-ness" is particularly appealing to me. This mild climate part has been put to the test in Vancouver. We have had majour snow this past week. 20 cm (9 inches) over the weekend. Another 17 cm (7-8 in) accumulated since last night. And forecasters are calling for another possible 10 cm (4-5 in) before it all stops. I truly get the one phrase in the Christmas carol that proclaims "snow had fallen snow on snow, snow-oh on snow"

So what's a West Coast flake to do when flakes are all around him? That was my dilemna as I set out to finish (translate "start") my Christmas shopping today. I layered, put on my ski jacket, my touque, my boots and ventured outside. Bring it on Mother Nature!! I live in downtown Vancouver, so no driving for me - just walk and shop, walk and shop. And as I began to walk and shop, I sensed a shift happening. Far from stress and strain, I took notice of and allowed an unexpected deep joy to settle within me. I looked around and began to take in the moment - relishing this particular moment in time. For me, one of the great gifts that Buddhism offers is the gift of mindfulness. Being present - right here, right now. Being full in the moment. And as I embraced this gift of mindfulness, I was surrounded by Holiness right in the middle of downtown Vancouver. As I savoured the gifts being offered, I was aware of a tangible joy and presence within me. I watched the beautiful snow fall. I observed the many shoppers bundled up scurrying about - smiles abounding with the occasional stop and hug with friends and family along the journey. I saw the beautiful Christmas tree in front of the Vancouver Art Gallery with it's many bright white lights. Even as I descended the escalator in Pacific Centre, I looked out over the festive red decorations that adorned the store. It was magical. I felt like a true Canadian!! And more importantly, this holy space felt like the Eve of the birth of a babe. Throughout the afternoon as I ran my debit card through the many tills, I was mindful of this special occasion that no amount of mild west coast rain could replicate. This was a gift of God to me.

Advent is my favourite season. It's a season of waiting, anticipating, expecting, opening oneself to something new, experiencing God in the unexpected. I was in an Advent moment. Who woulda thunk that something as ordinary as bundling up to head out in a most unusual snowfall to buy last minute gifts before the stores close would have been the framework for the blessing of experiencing Love in the natural world, the faces of strangers, the cash register of free enterprise, and even the dirty snow that drenched my backside as a transit bus passed by. God is truly in all and above all. Merry Christmas!

Welcome To BCCurt's World

Allow me to introduce myself! I am BCCurt. A transplanted Southerner who now proudly lives in Vancouver, British Columbia, BCCurt is one complex dude. Here are some basics about BCCurt.

* I was brought up independent Baptist (NOT - I repeat NOT - part of the heretical Southern Baptist Convention). Raised in Hickory, North Carolina, we at this independent Baptist church were "in this world, but not of it". This Scriptural passage was used to not only keep us away from movies, pop music, and "mixed bathing" (only you hardcore fundamentalists will know what that means), but also to strongly discourage us from eating yogurt because of the unstable nature of the cultures in the yogurt. Unstable yogurt cultures could lead to unstable and loose living in this world. OK - I made that part up. But the yogurt ban could have easily fit in our world. After high school graduation......

* I attended Bob Jones University in Greenville, SC for a year and a half. To describe those 18 months would take another entire blog. Email me if you want the sordid details. After escaping BJU......

* I attended and graduated from Appalachian State University in Boone, NC. Now THAT was a great school. I had several firsts there, such as realizing you could be a Democrat and a committed Christian. My university days were the best. Graduated with a BMus in Piano Performance. Felt a call to do church music, so.....

* I went to seminary at Oral Roberts University in Tulsa, OK. Again - another great experience for me that was also full of "firsts", such as my first sexual experience with another dude (more of that to come later). Graduated with an MA in Church Music. So what's a good evangelical boy to do after seminary?

* Get married, settle down, and follow the path of normal. This went well for a few years but then got upset when I.....

* Came out of the closet and waved goodbye to normal. Truly the most unstable time in my life (come to think of it, I was eating lots of yogurt then). Even went to the Exodus International Ex-Gay ministries (again - email me for the details) to try to get "straightened out". Didn't work. But hung in there and in 1995.....

* Became a United Methodist! Now for most of you, to list the act of becoming a United Methodist as an important event suggests that someone has a very sad existence. But these United Methodists taught me that I don't have to park my brains at the church door, but that I really can question, disagree, struggle, cry, laugh, argue, rest, and become. God bless the United Methodists!! And then in 1995 (that was a very good year for me), I.....

* Met my partner David. There is only one David and he is the only one I want to be with. He is charming, smart, VERY good looking, spiritual, caring, loving, and is the only one I know who can put up with my bullshit. As we were building our life together, we got a bit bored with the USA and decided to.....

* Move to Vancouver, British Columbia. Talk about hearing the call - Vancouver was screaming out our names to move here. The beauty, the magic of the city, the ocean and mountains, mild climate, open and progressive attitudes, the energy, the vibe, the skiing, the Olympics - it's all right here! David and I can't imagine living anywhere else. We became Canadian citizens in 2003. We legally married in 2004. Canada rocks!! It's like Disneyland for adults. And of course being the church geek that I am, in 2000, I also.....

* Became a member of the United Church of Canada. The United Church makes the United Methodists look like a bunch of right wing frothing-at-the-mouth red state conservatives. Liberal, flakey, loving, mushy, and FULL of Gospel, the United Church is my spiritual home. For me, this church comes the closest to living out the gospel and challenging me to live in faithful discipleship to Jesus Christ.

So there you go! That's my background and journey thus far. It helps to give you a little insight into BCCurt. Refer to this often in a lame attempt to understand BCCurt's world. It's one complex place. It doesn't always make sense. BCCurt's world holds together the traditionally contradictory. BCCurt's world doesn't fit any molds. It's a wonderfully bizarre arena that mixes together faith, foul language, fitness, sex, bad movies, off-colour humour, loving acts of kindness, open-mindedness, love, adventure, laziness, charm, crassness, honesty, and bullshit. I love this world!